Most people miss opportunities that can bring moment of joy and happiness everyday because they don’t appreciate good things happening to them. Gratitude (Great Attitude) is a pathway to happiness many of us don’t practice. I know what you are thinking. Give me a break! Gratitude is so cliché. Let me run through a couple of questions we all experience and tell me if this sounds like you.
Do you focus on things you don’t have?
Do you think you will be happy if you have more?
You probably answered yes to both questions like most of us. Sometimes, we don’t realise the good things and people in our life. We start to take them for granted. We often get caught up in things that don’t go our way. Before we know it, we have sabotaged our own happiness.
The hedonic treadmill
Humans adapt to the good things in life quickly and do not appreciate what we have. We don’t realise the true value of many things in life until we lose them. It becomes a pattern that causes us to overlook everyday beauty and positive things. We are busy chasing the next big thing. We fall into the trap that the grass is always greener on the other side. Envy is a natural emotion every human being experiences. We can’t help comparing ourself to other people who have more. As a result, we frequently miss opportunities of happiness and connection.
Emmons & McCullough define gratitude as a two-step process. Firstly, “recognizing that one has obtained a positive outcome” and then secondly “recognizing that there is an external source for this positive outcome.”
A powerful gratitude practice
Three Good Things is a gratitude practice developed by Professor Martin Seligman. It involves recounting three positive things and considering the sources of each goodness. Writing down the Three Good Things counteract hedonic adaptation and promotes the savouring of positive life experiences and situations. Instead of constantly dwelling on negative things, the practice of gratitude magnifies positive things in our lives. This could be waking up to a new day, a stranger letting the door open or someone offering you a cup of tea. If you want to learn how to get rid of common toxic thoughts pattern, read Free Yourself From These 3 Toxic Thought Patterns
Gratitude journal
Keeping a gratitude journal enables us to cultivate gratitude consistently. You might think oh journaling is not for me. It takes so much effort. I don’t want to sit down and think about the past. A pen and paper can serve as a powerful life tool. When you write down your thoughts and emotions, you get to learn more about yourself. It offers you a glimpse into your working mind like no other method can.
Write down what went well in details, reflect on the experience and feelings the events made you feel at the time and later. Write down why you think an event happened and if people were involved. The exercise can buffer negative thoughts especially when you have a bad day. Cultivating gratitude allowed me to refocus my mind on the positive that came from these events.
For example: I faced some IT problems that prevented me from printing scripts or letters from my computer. As a result, it delayed my clinic and caused much irritation. I had to ask someone else to print the documents several times. During my break, I phoned one of the admin staff about the problem who offered to come down promptly and the problem was solved. I was grateful someone kindly came to sort the situation. Three Good Things required some efforts, but I found it easier as I kept at it. For a step-by-step guide of the Three Good Things visit The Greater Good Science Center
Conclusion
Research has shown gratitude had lasting positive effects on health and wellbeing over time. Cultivating gratitude is a great way to capture and savour moments that would have otherwise been dismissed. If you want to increase your levels of happiness, optimism and hope Three Good Things might be the gratitude practice for you.
